It is said that native English speakers rarely use "so-so" in response to "How are you?", "How are you doing today?", etc. Is that true? If yes, in what context do native English speakers would use this term, "so-so", mostly? If they never or rarely use it, how come it is created?
The reason I asked such a question is because an American youtuber mentioned that they, naitve English speakers, never or rarely use such a term to answer such questions. Somehow, she also mentioned they would use "I'm O.K." or "Not bad" to express the similar feeling of "so-so". Does that mean you, native English speakers, avoid showing any negative feeling to a stranger or even a friend even though you do feel "so-so"? In another word, it is a very cultural meaning to not use any negative lines in reply to someone's "greeting", right? Unless, they are very close and know every well each other. Is that so?
Thank you for your help.
Don't tell Aunt Mabel about your indigestion--
"How are you?" is a greeting, not a question.
People vary, of course, but in the US the usual polite convention is that the response to "How are you?" is always positive and cheerful. It doesn't take very long for the truth to come out, but the opening sentences are a ritual. You say something vaguely positive, and let the other person decide from your body language and tone of voice whether to ask a real follow-up question to which you give a real answer.
The most negative "normal" response is "can't complain," and it's mostly used by older people because everyone knows that older people are rarely 100% "fine."
An answer like "so-so" is a signal that you are sick enough, depressed enough, etc. to break the polite convention.
Here's how the truth might emerge in a conversation, assuming that Lois is a fairly close friend:
"Hey, Steve, it's been ages! How are you?"
"Great, Lois! You're looking terrific! How are you?"
"Just fine! Say, has this hot weather been getting to you?"
"Well, the truth is I've been having trouble sleeping lately. I don't know if it's hay fever or what. I guess the pollen count is up."
"How's your work?"
"Oh, there's a big crunch on, deadline pressure, we're working overtime and we're all stressed..."
At this point, Lois understands that things are not really "great!"
In my (UK) experience, it's used to describe the quality of things like the weather or a film you watched. It means: overall, it's a little disappointing.
I never hear anyone (except learners) say: "I am so-so".
Excellent responses by Dan Smith and Michael Chambers!!
"How are you?" is a ritual greeting. It has the same meaning as "Hello."
The expected ritual answer is some version of "Fine. And you?"
"so-so" is an evaluation which is used as a reply to real questions. How was the movie? (great, pretty good, so-so (=disappointing, slightly bad), terrible).
