Writing Essays in English
Writing in English is really difficult for me, even though I have learned English in school for more than 8 years. I believe I am not the only person who has this problem in China, since I have heard so many people complaining that they could not write an English essay when they were asked to.
The defects of the Chinese education system could be responsible for this situation. The first English classes in elementary school and junior high school both teach the English alphabet, which is such a waste, because junior high students already have some basic knowledge of the English language since they have been taught English for more than 4 years in elementary school. <em>{previous sentence is a bit too long, consider splitting it into two sentences}</em> The lack of connection between these two levels of education makes students reluctant to follow these courses. Besides, all Chinese high school level education is in preparation for the college entrance examination, therefore the primary goal of English learning for students is to get good grades in exams. You can get an excellent score on the writing session of English exams, as long as you use the proper template. This fact does not only reduce the students’ enthusiasm for learning English, but also results in a situation that students cannot write a proper English essay without using templates.
College students and employees are not required to be able to write in English, unless they are in special industries. English writing skills are not necessarily needed for most businesses, so most people do not bother to improve these skills.
I was not taught in school or college about how to write an essay in English, and my job does not require me to have this skill. That leads me to this awkward situation, where I am asked to provide an English essay when I apply to a U.S. university, but I cannot write one.
Overall the quality of your writing seems really good to me. I made some changes, so that the sentences seem more professional, but they are just minor changes. It has been several years now since I was in high school, but from what I can remember, I think your written English might be better than some of my friends (when they finished high school)!
P.S. I think you are lucky to have learnt English at school. Perhaps you were not taught to the standard that you desired, but I think it's good that they gave you the important fundamental knowledge. As a native English speaker, I was not taught any foreign languages when I was young, so learning a language is much more difficult for me. I had to start right at the very bottom. As for essays, I only learnt how to write them in high school. In school I didn't learn how to write technical reports, research papers, a position description (to employ someone), a proposal / tender (to win a new business project), or an instruction manual, but I have written all these things in my lifetime... in other words, as long as you know enough about a language, you can figure out the rest yourself (or find instructions online).
