Between the two versions, the first version (AI-edited article) is grammatically better. Here’s why: 1. Clarity and Structure: The first version uses clear, concise sentences, making it easier to understand. It has a straightforward subject-verb-object structure, which improves readability. 2. Punctuation: The second version uses commas in a way that creates run-on sentences, making the sentence harder to follow. 3. Word Choice: The first version uses appropriate phrases like "village police station" and "self-criticism," while the second version has some awkward phrasing like "with them being hidden into the basin" and "tip-off to the police station." If you're looking for a more natural flow and proper grammar, the first version is stronger. However, the second version has a fun, casual tone (especially with the “lol”), which can be playful if you're aiming for a personal or informal style.

The first one is more or less perfectly structured. AI LLM translation apps are incredibly good nowadays, even for idiomatic expression, and especially if the content doesn't require a huge amount of context and is free from vagueness. This may not be the case for all languages, but for major languages, like Chinese translated to English, you can generally trust it. There may be some issues here and there, but for learning purposes, it's more than effective. At this point, for major language translations, it's probably capable of translating at a B2-C1+ level, so if you are below that, relying on AI translations and studying them is generally very effective. Maybe you wouldn't want to rely on them for legal contracts, but for general communication and studying, I think they work well. Out of curiosity and as a test, below is an AI translation of the above comment to Chinese. There is some technical language in there, but how well did the AI do? What language proficiency level do you think it is? 第一种结构或多或少比较完美。 如今，人工智能 LLM 翻译应用程序的表现令人难以置信，即使是成语表达，尤其是在内容不需要大量上下文且不含糊的情况下。 也许并非所有语言都是如此，但对于主要语言，如中文翻译成英文，一般来说是可以信赖的。 可能会有一些问题，但对于学习目的来说，它还是比较有效的。 在这一点上，对于主要语言的翻译，它可能能够达到 B2-C1+ 的翻译水平，所以如果你的水平低于这个水平，依靠人工智能翻译并学习它们一般会非常有效。 也许你不希望依靠它们来签订法律合同，但对于一般的交流和学习，我认为它们很有效。

The AI version (#1) is grammatical and clear, even if it is not outstanding. As for your version (#2), I will mention one big problem that Albert did not mention. You use only one active verb, "stole", other than the verb "to be". Rather than use active verbs, you uses participles instead: "learning", "being hidden", "known", "doing", "cleaning", "giving", "letting", "setting". Participles are not active verbs, even though each participle comes from an underlying verb. Note, by contrast, that the AI version uses only one participle. This alone makes it a far better paragraph than yours. Participles are not wrong. Your use of them does not constitute a grammatical error. However, it renders your prose weak because it impossible to tell a story, make an argument, or explain anything using only participles. The verbless participle heavy style is characteristic of Asian speakers. It makes your paragraph stand out as one written by a speaker of an Asian language. I have heard well educated speakers use the verbless style with great fluency. The longer you use it, the more difficult it will become to break the habit. Study English verbs and use them. Inside of participles, there hide real verbs. Use them!

As everyone else has said, the first one has faultless grammar, but it lacks some colourful language which you have used on the second one. This is a fault of AI which seems to be hardwired in at the moment - it gravitates towards rather arbitrary sentence structures, sometimes changing the meaning slightly as it goes. If you want to keep more of your original sentence, you could go something like When at school in grade three (or third grade - depending on which country's education system you're alluding to)... I stole ten big hard persimmons and hid them in the basin under my bed, which was. discovered by my father when doing some cleaning. He tipped off the police station in my village, which led to the head of the village making me write...