我今天想到一个有意思的注意:把我最喜欢的英语诗译成中文。但我一开始发现了最难的方面跟词汇语法什么的并没有关系。其实,最难的就是:怎么把英文版的美貌转到中文?
翻译中文诗也不容易。看一下李白的《静夜思》:
床前明月光
疑是地上霜
举头望明月
低头思故乡
然后看一下两个不同的英文翻译:
1.
At the foot of the bed, bright moonlight
I imagine frost on the floor
Raising my head, I gaze at the bright moon
Lowering my head, I think of my old village
2.
Moon light by the bedding shines
So bright like frost upon the loam.
The head lifts gazing at the moon,
And sinks back down with thoughts of home.
你们觉得哪个翻译是最美?第一个翻译是最正确的直译,但对英文母语者没有任何感动的印象。就是听起来像一个人随意聊天。第二个呢,译者很聪明地用英语发音的重音系统造一个漂亮的节奏。而且第二个翻译也符合英语诗的普通韵律。所以这是一个英语母语者能了解的美貌翻译(说实话,我真不会欣赏中国诗。如果我比较一首杜甫的诗和一首被初中学生写的诗,我真看不出来哪个最美,真是对牛弹琴。)
(...)
严复的’信达雅‘理论和尤金·奈达的“功能对等” (dynamic and formal equivalence)有异曲同工之妙。
They use different approaches and emphasize different translation strategies, but i think the effect they both want to pursue are the same.
尤其是文学翻译中,没有完美的翻译。there is always more to do...
p.s : 我还看到另外一种翻译:
In the Quiet Night
So bright a gleam on the foot of my bed-
Could there have been a frost already?
Lifting up my head to look, I found that it was moonling/
Sinking back again, I thought suddenly of home.
(Tr. by Witter Bynner)
这个讨论好!我对中英翻译很感兴趣~~~
首先,语言和语言之间的翻译是无法做到完全对等(equivalence)的。
其次呢,在文学翻译领域中,比如你说的诗歌啊、小说啊,中国人遵循的是翻译的三大原则——’信达雅‘。(严复的理论 )
信 (faithfulness):忠实原文, to be royal to the original text first.(you are not supposed to add, omit or change the meaning from original texts. )
达 (expressiveness):不拘泥于形式,要通顺、达意, based on rule A faithfulness, you can change slightly change the format to convey meanings to target readers clearly and easily. For example, the second translation here has changed the original sentence form as you see, unlike the first translation, which is highly royal to the original text in terms of form and content.
雅(elegance): 用词要得体,追求优雅, this must be the highest pursuit of excellent translation, your translation is supposed to keep the same style with the original one as well as the flow of emotions. For example, when you read this English translation of 静夜思, as a non-native, you can feel the same emotion as the way native readers feel. The second version is better than the first one obviously in this case.
在古书中,可能大家看到的《静夜思》是这个样子的:
@Meiyu(Miok):你提供的翻译也好听,比我的好。你给的翻译有比较现代的风格而且节奏更灵活,我给的有古老一点的味道(节奏很平衡,词汇比较过时,比如英文单词 loam)。那么,李白是个古代的诗人,但英文翻译在现代被创造。译者应该为了捕获李白的风格故意用不符合现代英语的语言吗?这个问题很难决定。
@Geoffrey:说得有道理:译者的义务当但包括创造,而不一定等于不真实的伪造。七十年代有一本叫Gödel, Escher, Bach: An Eternal Golden Braid的书被发行。那本书很复杂,充满有比喻,双关语,关于语言的玩笑,但是却被翻译成很多语言了。因为译者不能翻译所有幽默而深刻的意义,所以只能创造适合本语言的意义。比方说,那本书的中文名字是《哥德尔、埃舍尔、巴赫:集異璧之大成》。看到了双关语吗?
集異璧 = G.E.B. = Gödel, Escher, Bach!那个玩笑根本翻译不了成英文,而且比原来的名字有意思!
从某种角度讲我认为翻译也是再创造,我很喜欢泰戈尔的诗集,它被中国译者郑振铎翻译的很美。
如果没有沉浸式的语言环境体验,就很难欣赏甚至翻译另一种语言的诗歌。举个例子:“庄生晓梦迷蝴蝶,望帝春心托杜鹃"。你清楚这句诗的意思吗?很难是吧。中文古诗中常常使用大量的典故,通常是过去数千年中发生的历史故事,我想这也是翻译的巨大障碍之一,希望你能找到其中的乐趣。